if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
