But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
