I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
