I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize