Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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