I just saw a hot homeless man
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize