Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
