And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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