3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
