I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
