nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
