Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
We smell like vodka and hangover
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