i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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