So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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