on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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