i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
third nipple confirmed
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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