shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Randomize
