really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
