at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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