Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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