I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
