Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
