The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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