in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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