My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
God I need to hump something, right now.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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