he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
