do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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