i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I have aggressive nipples.
Randomize