my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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