i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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