hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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