OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
he shaved USA in his pubs
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
