your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Your mouth is God's brothel.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize