Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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