U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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