I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
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Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
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If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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