before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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