everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
