I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
You can't special order awesome
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
So squirting runs in the family.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
19 Doctors Confess The Most Difficult Situation They’ve Ever Had To Face
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.