Kiss
Puke
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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