There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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