I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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