i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
