only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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