Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize