Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize