I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
