My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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