Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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