just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
