The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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